- feeling
guilty for the abuse and for not stopping it
- grieving
for family and personal losses
- confusion
or conflicting feelings towards parents
- fear of
abandonment, of expressing emotions, of the unknown, and/or personal injury
- anger about
violence and chaos in their lives
- depression,
feelings of helplessness
-
embarrassment by the effects of abuse and dynamics at home
- acting out
or withdrawing
-
overachiever or underachiever
- refusing to
go to school
- care
taking, more concerned for others than self; parent substitute
- aggressive
or passive
- rigid
defenses (aloof, sarcastic, defensive, "black and white" thinking)
- excessive
attention seeking (often using extreme behavioral measures/tactics.
- bed-wetting
and nightmares
- out of
control behavior, not able to set own limits or follow directions
- aggression
towards the mother or woman caregiver
- somatic
complaints (headaches, stomachaches, and other "unexplained"
illnesses)
- nervous,
anxious and short attention span (may be misdiagnosed as having Attention
Deficit Hyper Activity Disorder)
- tired,
lethargic
- frequently
ill
- poor
personal hygiene
- regression
development (bed-wetting, thumb sucking; depending on age)
-
desensitization to pain
- high risk
play and activities
- self abuse
- unable to
accept support and assistance from adults
- isolation
from friends and relatives
-
relationships are frequently stormy, start intensely and end abruptly
- difficulty
in trusting, especially adults
- poor anger
management and problem-solving skills
- excessive
social involvement (to avoid home life)
- may be
passive with peers or bully peers
- engage in
exploitive relationships, either as perpetrator or victim
- play with
peers gets exceedingly rough
- blaming
others for their own behavior
- believing
it is acceptable to hit people they care for in order to get - what they want,
to express anger, to feel power, or to get others to - meet their needs
- possessing
a low self-concept originating from a sense of family powerlessness
- not asking
for what they need, let alone what they want
- distrustful
- believing
that anger is bad because people get hurt
- rigid
stereotypes: to be a boy means...to be a girl means...to be a man, woman,
husband, wife, partner means...
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